Growing up, I remember there being an awful lot of myths. There were myths for everything no matter what. To name but a few there was the myth about the legendary bright green bum bag being the holy grail of bum bags, the one about all the men and women employed especially to bend bananas, the myth that a swan could break your arm with its wing, and the myth that if the wind changed while you were mucking about, Read more »

What happened to the good old-fashioned classic “Hello, how are you?” I can’t remember the last time I heard it! Nowadays it’s anything but and rarer than cheap skin care treatment. Some of the worst offenders are: 1) “How’s it going?” 2) “All good?” 3) “Been time”. And the deplorable 4) “Wassup?”

It’s got to the stage that I need to carry my dictionary around with me just to get by.

The thing which annoys me about these statements Read more »

If there’s a part of your body which has skin on it then, chances are, you’ll be able to get an implant in it too. And we’re not just talking breasts. You can get an implant anywhere: Back implants, Calf implants, Penis implants (although implants plural might be overkill. If you’re that desperate then I suggest you go with one and see how that works out for you–)

Yes, an implant in your penis, or, as they are Read more »

It’s very easy to believe things. A good copy-writer will be able to take a series of what are actually very mundane facts, and turn them in to compelling reading that has you hooked on every word and needing more. And energy-saving is no stranger to this practice of sexing things up. I forget how many times I have found myself on a web-site in awe of how much energy I could save if I shaved all the fur off Read more »

You see them everywhere. They are a people so disturbing that even speaking of them is inducing minor heart-attacks in various parts of my brain: something which should not be possible! In towns, cities, villages. The curse of a nation so unthinkably wasteful that nothing, not even tea is safe from a premature demise. Who am I ranting on about? Tea wasters, of course. The men, women and children who value tea as much as the stuff dogs extricate. The Read more »

My grandparents, like many, hate change. Change is their enemy. I don’t blame them, I can be a stickler for change myself, and I grew up in this wild information sending age. What must it have been like for them?! It must have been frightening discovering that things such as ‘mouses’ can, without any wires at all, move a pointer about on a two-dimensional screen which then allows you to magically buy whatever you like using digital money that doesn’t Read more »